Pe'el Manusia

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Pe'el manusia yang betul buat aku ketawa..
Pe'el manusia yang betul paranoia dengan masa lampau
Hingga benda yang dah tak lagi wujud
Tapi terus risau hingga hari ini..
Walaupun benda yang dirisaukan tejadi bezaman yang lalu..
Mungkin setahun yang lalu.. Mungkin 2 tahun yang lalu..

Betul lah kate akhil dan rakan-rakannya..
"desakan ini memaksaku pergi..
biar mati pun tak kan berani tuk datang kembali..

Apa2pun.. Belajar la memaafkan and move forward..
Tahu itu sesuatu yang sangat payah dan susah..
Cakap memang mudah kan..
Yang tukang type ni pun belum lagi dapat let go
ape yang da kat hati die even dah nak 3 tahun cerita tu belalu..

Secara kesimpulan, iye..
Aku ketawa dengan pe'el aku sendri..
Tapi aku hanya sedar hakikat yg "PE'EL" ini kelakar
bila aku aku baca chat box di satu blog..
Manusia manusia..


p/s: will create a new blog.. Who wish to follow, do follow.. Siapa yang tidak mahu, its fine~


Friday the 21st~

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Innitially me wanted to blog about the bacholorrete party that took place last thursday but i am just so lazy to copy the pictures from my memory card.. Nanti2 ok.. I will blab about.. Those girls want to see the pictures as well.. Sabar ye kawan2.. Nanti2 ku khabar kan juga..

Dah bepuas sakan berparty last thursday, i spend my day yesterday get my marketing assignment done with friends at the most comfy place to study.. At the Starbucks, The Curve!! :) Went there around 3pm earlier than others so that i could grab sandwhices first.. Heheh~

But baru je start makan, Fary arrived.. So we started doing our assignment while Harry was still on his way.. Budak bijak ikut MRR2 on friday lalu Batu Caves, memang macam tu.. Slow.. Heheh.. Bace the case study cam haram.. Result given was kindda confusing.. Nak kire those stats, alahaaaiiiii..

Tu die.. Buku ngan banyak nye.. Orang laen siap bawa buku and laptop.. And me? Bawa kertas2 ada atas meja tu je la.. Hahhaha... Berat kowt nak bawa seme tu.. Tak leh tak leh.. Dah empat jam duk kat situ, we managed to get the discussion done. Kaya kan starbucks tu only GOD knows la kan.. Ngan cake la, air la, blended la.. Hahah...Kerja siap and perut pun kenyang :D

Once everything done, we headed to one of the music store.. And we spent rm212 there.. Bought the cheapest ticket.. Sebab kata mereka2 yg nak pegi ni, tak perlu ticket mahal2.. Janji we go and have fun.. Ticket ape ye?? Bukan ticket concert justin bieber ok.. Tengok gambar kat bawah...~

Weeee... We are going to Maher Zain's concert!! Yippi... Nak pakai ape eh? Jubah? Arbaya?? Hahahah~

That is all.. I didnt do nothing much yesterday..~

This pic above was taken on my second day of class.. Yes.. Itu la air and air yang kite bawa everyday pegi kelas.. That "Green Idea Notebook" is the note book that the irani girl kept on rampas from me.. Hahah~


Cerita tentang sang irani~

Friday, January 21, 2011

I think i owe my blog this story.. About a foreigner in my class. Adoi, pecaya la.. If i could tell the story verbally, sure lagi mantop and if u could experience it by urselves, confirm lagi punah hati dan sanubari kalian.. For this story, i have to write this blog in different form.. ;p

Last semester, there was one irani guy in my class and he happened to be my team mate for HR subject..
Lucky satu sabject je!!~
Anyway, he always said that he understood everything..
Tak kesah la, ape yang lecturer pesan ke or ape yg kerja yang ada dalam text, buku or article..
Which he DID NOT!!

First time we encountered this was 2 weeks after class begun and it was our first group assignment.
The lect asked us to go back and discuss among ourselves then only we discuss in class in the following week and then only we come up with a report..
So that was what me and 2 other exactly did, except for him..
He prepared a complete report which at first i was overwhelmed and thankful..
But after i read a few lines, trus jadi cam..
So i did everything by myself.. Alone without any help from the other two which i didnt mind at all..
The girls asked me, why did not i used the one he prepared and i explained why then they thought i was too picky and choosy which i told them, "Lantak la nak kata apa pun.. I am not gonna accept his work".

Second group assignment was given to us and that assignment required us to present
He was supposed to submit his part to us like 3days before the presentation
but he did not..
He emailed his slides to my friend at 7.45am when the presentation started at 8.30am..
Sakit hati gua.. Mana dan nak print.. Mana dan nak make copies for everyone..
Bangang ke brilliant??
Sabar lagi kitorg..
We gave him a VERY small part.. Discuss pendek je because of his accent n lingua, org tak phm..
So we did not want to put our marks at stake..
Tapi tak.. Part die yang boleh settle in 5mins, dia bantai bebel up until 30mins..
Ntah apa die merepek n meraban only he knew..
We tried to stop him but he insisted on talking..

Third assignment.. Another presentation required..
Again, he submitted late.. Lepas subuh die email..
Macam nak cekik je.. Nasib beliaw 30.. Kalau my age and melayu mesti gua bebel baek punya..
Nak maki in english, tak bekesan dehy.. English is a decent language..
Marah in english orang tak takot ;p
We assigned him with the shortest part AGAIN.. But he gave us around 15 slides..
And at that time my internet connection failure pulak so i did not get to take a look at those..
Dah dalam kelas pun tak sempat nak usha sbb the two girls got stuck in traffic inside the damn university itself.. Haihh..
So masa present la baru gua sempat tgk..
And AGAIN, cam nak tecabot jantung gua..
He typed ever single thing from the text book.. Hoi!!! And he blabbed for almost an hour.. I cant stop him because we are in the same group..
I prayed that someone could actually stop him but seme org keras kejung la plak..
Hishh.. Sakit hati aku.. Markah aku tuh!!

Project paper..
Main assignment as a group where we were asked to interview 5 different companies in the same industry just to see the differences of each one..
Untuk project ni, mmg ku akui i was harsh with him and i did not regret a bit..
At first he was so eager to start the project..
"Tak nak tangguh kerja" katenye..
I told him that i will let him know what he will be doing..
And at the same time i told my friend to handle him.. As in PLS TAKE HIM AWAY FROM ME BEFORE I MURDER HIM..
He did not get the hint at first.. Weeks later, he asked me about the project..
Dengan tegar ku kate beserta tangan betul2 di hadapan mukanya,
"I dont wish to hear a word from u.. And if u have anything to tell me, pls.. Talk to my hand"..
Kurang ajar and kurang sopan.. But i had to do that as he pull down our marks really bad.. Like REALLY REALLY bad..
Tak penah la aku risau nak seat final exam, but last semester kitorg seme tepaksa risau sebab carry mark kitorg sangat rendah..
After the whole project was done, we had to present it.. Again, i had to asked my friend
To call him to inform him that pls dont bother to show up.. But we will still put his name in..
So he did not turn up.. And the presentation was a major success.. We picked our topic, problem well..
Presented precisely and perfectly in 30minutes..
And the lecturer was pleased with it..

Itu cerita irani sem lepas.. Irani sem ni?? Perghhh...

This semester my class that was originally had 21 students tetibe jadi 30+
The class became so uncomfy and the new comers started to steal our seats and make noise in the class..
One of the new comers is an irani lady who is 30 years old as well... (haihhhh)..
On the very first day, she sat next to me.. Which, nak tak nak.. Tepaksa redha la kan..
First day, we had no textbook and no notes..
So i copied down whatever the lect said or drew on the board and what ever that was on the slides..
While i was STILL writing, cik kak ni leh main gembira je tarik my note books..
I was like.. WHAT????
But did not say a word.. First day.. Tak mau bikin ribut.. So LAYANNNNN~
She did that like 10 times in 4 hours.. Daymn!!
Abis je kelas, my gilrs who were seating behind me pun cakap..
"Galak gila dia tarik buku kau!!".. Haihhh...

Day two was a slightly different..
She wanted to seat next to me me but there was no chair.
So she sat in front of me instead..
Then masa nak salin notes, she turn behind and i pretended like i did not see her..
Ignored her secara total dan kental..
Then she turned to her right which and took a black pen from my friend..
I could not stop from laughing sbb tengok my friend cam kamjat habis.. Hahah
So the class ended and we went for lunch..
During lunch, i told my girls..
"Esok, tolong bawa extra garments sbb die pakai baju, tudung n pants semlm"..
But they did not notice.. Danggg!~

Day three, she sat away from us. She sat with her clans n friends which it was totally cool with us..
But she wore the same outfit..
Makenye, 3 hari wearing the same thing..

Following monday our class got cancelled.. So sikda cerita..
On tuesday morning, she did not seat near me.. Thank GOD..
But tuesday afternoon, she wanted to seat next to me..
But i told her, someone is sitting there.. So she left.. Thank goodness..
While waiting for lecturer to come in, i read notes for wednesday's class..
Ngan slumber alam, die nak cekau notes aku.. Damn..
"Woi, print sendri la!!"
Since she did not manage to take mine, she took from other's.. Minah tu redha kan aje.. Hahah..

Wednesday.. We rode on the same bus.. Kitorg kena parking jauh and the uni provides us with busses..
I was alone in the bus until she climbed up.. Alahai...
Tried to not to look her in the eye.. Gile2 mcm tak nampak die..
Bile dah turun, jalan sepantas kilat tak nak jalan sama dgn die..
Masuk je kelas, my seat dah da org amek.. Kengkawan die la..
Then a friend of mine said that i could sit next to him..
Tetibe minah tu pegi.. I was like.. WHAT??? AGAIN!!
Tak pe la.. I changed place and duk kat depaaaannnnn sekali..
Lecturer start je buka mulut nak ajar, that was the time i heard..
"Excuse me..."
Perghhh, di jalan belakang gwe and duk sebelah gwe.. Tekanannnnn!!
Masa ngah belaja tu, i referred to the notes and also my text book..
Conteng and highlight the textbook la.. Sebab dah beli mahal2..
Takkan tak nak guna plak kan..
Nak jadi cerite, the lect gave us exercises to do.. Questions are in the text book..
So fine la kan.. Ngah dengar beliaw mengajar lagi.. Tetibe dengar cik kak berkata..
"U write on the paper (the printed notes), i want the book"..
Tak sempat menjwb, die dah tarik buku aku..
Panas hati gile2!!
Tunggu 5saat.. Ku bekata kemudian..
"Sorry, i paid for the book.. So its me whos using it.. Get one on ur own missy"..
Sabar je la...

Then ada 10mins break.. She took out a flusk from her bagpack..
And that was the time i said to my friends..
"Beg besar2, berat2.. Tapi tak da buku.. Rupenye bawa air nescafe satu thermos"..
Geram betul aku..
On our bus ride back to the parking lot, friends were asking ape cite duk sebelah die..
So i told them pasal rampas buku and thermos tu..
Also, i said.. "Beg besar, bawa buku tulis mcm buku bdk sekolah sekeping and pen sebatang.. Which pen tu pun pen harry yang die rembat last week"..
Nguji kesabaran sungguh!!..

Minggu ni, die duk jauh2 dari gwe which sangat syukur alhamdulillah..
Cume tetibe, die dah tak bawa thermos die tu..
Instead, die bawa air yang kite bawa every single day..

Air Whyte Tea Chrysanthemum... Terima kasih la kan.. Also Riffles choc juga!
Psycho.. Ape aku minum n makan setiap hari pun tiru ke??..
And guess what.. Ngan cara ku lilit selendang juga!!
And shawl to wrap up kalau sejuk..
Die tak lilit selendang.. Tak pernah.. Dari sem lepas, die slempang kan je!!
Die tak pernah bawa shawl... Die tak pernah complaint sejuk pun..
Tetibe je pakai shawl.. Lipat shawl pun style aku..
Die selalu pakai sandals, now die pakai flip flops.. Apakah??
Pas nih nak kena cari identity laen plak..
Sakit jiwa n limpa aku...

Kelas, baru start 3 minggu.. I have another 3 more months..
Selamat betahan ye daisy~

Jodoh itu ketentuan ALLAH~

Thursday, January 20, 2011

When u just broke up with someone, the news spread like viruses and germs. People would know immediately and questions will be asked.. Why? Bile? Apasal? Korangkan dah lama.. So on and so forth. Tak lupa juga, people who have been eyeing on u juga akan muncul semula..

Yesterday i went to class early. Ni semua sebab nak rebut tempat duduk dalam kelas. Went there around 11 though class starts at 2pm ;p Buruk perangai kan.. All of sudden this semester ramai pulak budak dari ceruk mana ntah masuk kelas gua n main suke2 je curi tempat gua.. Hangin ar gua!! Ni belum buka lagi cerita pasal budak iran tu.. Ishk..

Anyway, Around 12pm, Fary called Ain who was with me. Fary invited us both for lunch. We planned to hit sek 16, instead we went to sek 18. After we ordered, fary and mimiey went to the bank across the street and i wandered around looking for shop selling panadol. Then my phone rang and it was from the guy in the pic below~

He asked where was i (biasalah, kepala dah sakit n kaki bz bejalan cari kedai ditambah ngan suara keras) ku straight to the point of my location.. So he came and joint the four of us. This guy is the one who waited for me for nearly 5 years now, who got married recently and didn't like it.. Ingat tak i blabbed about him? Kachuak kan.. Tapi mengapakah saya asyik menolak beliaw?? We talked, he asked about my studies and i asked him about his marriage.. He didnt say much at that time until when we were in the car on our way back to the fac. The girls ditched me.. Bagus kan.. Superb betul kwn2 ku ini!

He told me almost everything.. How he met the wife, why he decided to get married.. How is life at home. Ayat sama yang akan saya dengar dari setiap ex.. "Dia tak sama macam awak.. Bebel tak berenti.. Bla bla bla".. Oh kaseh, there is only one daisy and no one can be like her.. He told me what he is about to do next. Seriously i was shocked like hell. Secara live telecast, tanganku shaking di situ juga. I got reproposed by him.. Yes he did that again..

A bit recap about my life with this young gent ya.. So that angle boleh paham..
It all started in May 2006, i was with zeolord at that time. Zeolord and him were sort of housemates. Back then me and zeolord would have lunch together almost every single day. And secara coincidence, we just love to have our lunch together as couple and also nak makan ngan gang sendiri.. Maka, saya akan bawa kawan2 saya and zeolord akan bawa kawan2 dia. Memang restaurant kami punya la.. Muahahah~

One fine day, i realized a guy was looking at me. Didnt really recognize his face but i remembered his face by heart ever since. Orang duduk opposite kamu and tenung kamu kat nak sejam, takkan la tak ingat kan kan kan.. I didnt tell zeolord cos i didnt see the necessity. Few nights after he called and told me this:

"Saya habis je belaja, saya nak kumpul duit and kawen dengan awak"
Gulp, i was 21 ok.. I didnt say anything cos i seriously thot he was joking. When we finished our diploma, i broke up with zeolord.. Family reasons.. He and i got really close.. On 11 november 2006, he proposed.. Blegghhhh... Ku fikir beliaw sudah lupe, apparently belum. I told him that i wont be thinking about that until i finished my degree. Which he and his mother agreed.. However in june 2007, i sorta broke up with him.. Reasons that only i know about.. He accepted it tapi niat tetap tak berubah.

In june 2009, i was supposed to see his mother and fetch his younger sister at the klia.. Benda jadi seperti sangat serious and at that time ku sudah bersama inchik dadu.. Maka, ku lari lagi ;p He called and emailed me once awhile.. Nak check dah abes degree ke belum sebab nak merisik and everything. That was when i told him about my MBA.. And in june 2010, i told him to please leave me alone. Macam seksa jiwa dia kan. He once said, selagi kita tak kawen dgn sesiapa and selagi he can locate me, selagi itu die akan tunggu. So i had to do what i had to do.. Bla bla bla.. Could not reach me and bla bla bla.. He got married and didnt like it..

Thats the whole story of me and him. I told him that i dont want to get involved and do not have any intention of influencing him.. He said he understood that. Cume ever since he got married, his mother maken rajen tanye how am i doing and when will i finish my studies. If korang la kan kat tempat kita, apa la korang rasa? What actions will u take?

He texted me last night; "Kalau awak itu dah ditakdirkan memang milik saya, datang la apa pun masalah awak tetap hak saya. Pecaya la pada jodoh"..
Kita dah puas lari dari dia.. Kita dah puas tolak dia.. May 2006 until Jan 2011.. Penat dah kita belari.. I never tell anyone about him, except for Dice.. And sikit to Wak Kepal.. Zeolord once asked me about him, but i didnt say a word.. But everntually zeolord found out about it from their circle of friends and result, zeolord and him tak boleh nak tentang mata pun sampai hari ni...

Settle satu huge confession.. Ada belambak lagi tak confess.. Hahaha~

Theater.. Music.. Partaayyyy~

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Lat Kampung Boy The Musical :)

I did not know that there is this show in town. I just found out through twitter minutes ago. Owh i am so thrill!! Nak tengok!! Urmm.. When is the show eh? Gotta check later. Sape yang ku mahu drag? Heheh..

Next week, me and girls are going to watch Tun Mahathir Musical (finally!!) Wanted to watch it last year but dice was sombong.. Belagak tak nak tengok.. So, yeah.. Gonna hit istana budaya next week.. Cant wait.. Urm.. They have replaced erra with misha though.. Tak pe la.. Layannnnn~

Just would like to blab a bit here.. Tomorrow we will be celebrating the bride to be.. A bachelorette party!! Dari tengah hari sampai midnite.. Bunch of games, activities and food! But ill only be there around 6pm until midnite saje.. Venue? Either at a hotel in town or we hit various places.. Venue yang agak susah sikit sebab thaipusam kan.. We are thinking of secutiry aspect as well.. Theme?? Black and Red!! Woot woot~

Oraitz.. Got to go.. I have proposal to do.. I am the project director AGAIN.. Taking the class to hit beijing and singapore ;p Hopefully budget lepas la~ Hikhikhik~


Tuesday :)

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Owh tuesday.. While typing this im sitting in the class and supposedly i should be reading journals. To prepare myself for upcoming presentation. Supposed to read everything and discuss with the lecturer and get her approval. Instead, im typing this like nobody's business... Owh and berBBM with him.. Life is good :) Thank you for the BB service.. Being in two different continents pun tak terasa.. Kudos to BlackBerry.. Dgn ini, tak jadi jual Bold3 saya~

Tuesday is actually a VERY hectic day. A day where you have to attend two classes and each class is around 4 hours.. Macam hampeh kan.. So normally, balik je dari kelas, ill shower and sleep straight away.. No dinner, no tv and no revision.. Tak bley bla nye penat.. I named tuesday as *A-day-of-too-much-of-input-in-a-sentence*.. hahahah.. And trust me, seeing too many words and listening to lecturers blabbing makes my tummy growling.. Perghhhh...~

Aite, tudelu.. :)

Menulis di kala sejuk2 gelap~

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Hey there blog. I jst came back from brunch with ma friend. We spent around 3 hours talking about ourselves. Talked about this and that and said goodbye. I did not cry.. I managed to control my tears. Owh Bagus kan saya..

Ini beliaw texting his friend, discussing about tonite's flight. Thank GOD someone will fly with him tonite. He came back alone ari tu.. Kejung boring kata beliaw duk dalam sorang2.. Heheh.. Pity u dear. So he gave me few gifts tadi.. Tops, shawl and keychain.. Didn't snap the picture of the items and was not going to.. Rasie ;p

This time he will only be gone for 3 months so i have set the calender and alarm.. By 17 april 2010 at 2pm, die mesti kena call kita dari KLIA.. Hikhikhik.. So, dear hunn.. I am gonna miss u so much. Thanx for sharing all the experience and listened to my blab.. I will see u again soon and do take care orait.. Stay in touch ok.. Love u lots :)

Cerita semalam pula..

I attended a friend's wedding reception. Went there with my whole family.. Pelik tak? Mesti la tak kan.... Her mother was my mom's bestfriend.. Mamy and arwah berkawan dari umur 7tahun sampai la arwah meninggal in 2001 when me n my friend were 16. So technically, mamy macam mak angkat die juga plus her house is only 5minutes away (walking distance :p )

Girls yang laen tu housemates die. Dia keja tak duk umah family dia sebab jauh dari office. And me and her friends are close as well.. :)

Funny story happened yesterday.. Her official photographer invited me to be his model at putrajaya.. Wakakakak.. Geli lutut gwe semlm.. My ex boyfirned (dice) was a photographer pun tak penah snap gambar aku.. Masuk photographer semlm, dah 2 photographer ajak jd "minah sengeh" depan camera.. The first man approached me thru twitter.. Quite a fame one plak tu.. Gelak je yang mampu ku lakukan..

I dont like to be in front of the lenses.. Sila cari minah laen ok :)

Til my next update :)

Me Me Me :D

Ohkay, i STOLE this entry from miss duckky kita.. I know i should not be blogging now but i think i want to start of writing/updating my blog as a habit even i dont have anything to write about.. ;p

Right, i represent myself in purple :)

My personality:
I’m loud.
I’m obnoxious.
I’m sarcastic.
I’m cocky.
I cry easily.
I have bad temper.
For the most part I don’t like people.
I’m easy to get along with.
I have more enemies than friends.
I’ve smoked.
I’ve smoked weed.
I drink coffee.
I clean my room daily.
PS: Lucky the options of negative att are minimum :)

My appearance:
I wear makeup.
I wear a piece of jewellery at all times.
I wear contacts.
I wear glasses.
I have braces.
I change my hair colour often.
I straighten my hair often.
I have a piercing.
I have small feet.
PS: Well i think i have a perfect size of footwear.. But people always claim that i have small feet.. So layan kan aje.. Im wearing size 5 ok!! :)

I’m in a relationship now.
I'm single.
I’m crushin’.
I’ve missed an ex before.
An ex has physically abused me at least once.
I’ve told someone I loved them when I didn’t.
I’ve told someone I didn’t love them when I did.
I’ve been in love more than two times.
I believe in love at first sight.
I believe lust is more important than love.
PS: No good news for me and im not looking for any at the moment.. Living life to the fullest with parents, friends and books :)

I have a best friend.

I have at least ten friends.
I’ve gotten a phone call in the last 48 hours from a friend.
I’ve beaten up a friend.
I’ve been in a serious fight with a friend.
I can trust at least five people with my life.
PS: I dont really have much friends. But the ones that i have now are the ones that i can keep til the end of my life.. Senang cerita "kawan susah senang la" :)

I’ve been on a plane.
I’ve been on a train
Someone close to me has died.
I’ve taken a taxi.
I’ve taken a city bus.
I’ve taken a school bus.
I’ve gone bungee jumping.
I’ve made a speech.
I’ve been in some sort of club.
I’ve won an award.
I’ve spent 24 hours on the computer straight.
I’ve been in a physical fight.
PS: City bus.. Whoaaa... I did my practical under Rapid KL once and i nvr ride their busses.. Hahahah~

I listen to R&B.
I listen to country.
I listen to pop.
I listen to techno.
I listen to rock.
I’m one of those people who play songs repeatedly until I hate it.
I hate the radio.
I download music.
I buy CD’s.
PS: Conclusion.. I listen to anything and everything that is FREE :D

I spend at least six hours a day watching television.
I watch soap operas daily.
I’m in love with Days Of Our Lives.
I've seen and liked the O.C.
I've seen and liked One Tree Hill.
I've seen and liked Popular.
I've seen and liked 24.
I’ve seen and liked CSI
.I've seen and liked Everwood.
PS: Same as miss ducky, i am a hallmark person yoo *yeay*

I've been brown.
I’ve had streaks.
I’ve cut my hair in the past year.
I’ve dyed my hair in the past year.
I’ve been blonde.
I’ve had black.
I’ve been red.
I've been light brown.
I’ve been medium brown.
I’ve been blue/green.
I’ve had my hair thinned.
I use conditioner.
I’ve used silk therapy.
I’ve used hot oil treatments.
I’ve curled my hair.
I’ve straightened my hair.
I’ve braided my hair.
PS: Pasni nak wat ape eh ngan rambut?? :p

I’ve yelled at a teacher.
I’ve been suspended.
I’ve had an in-school suspension.
I’ve been sent to the principal’s office.
I’ve walked out of class.
I’ve skipped an entire day of school.
I’ve skipped a whole month of one certain class.
I’ve failed Art.
I’ve failed P.E.
I’ve failed math.
I’ve failed science.
I’ve failed another class.
A teacher has called my parents
PS: Hahah.. I was not a nerd in school and definitely was not the notty one either.. But i hv likes and dislikes juga.. So itu la die ;0

Ok, i am freaking late now. I have a breakfast date with my friend at McD Shah Alam.. He is going back to Abu Dhabi tonite.. Remember i blabbed about him about 6 months ago?? He came back during xmas holiday itu hari so mlm ni kena fly balik la.. So daaaaa :)


Day 2

Saturday, January 15, 2011

I read my old posts as in 2009's posts.. I couldn't not to realise that my writing were different back then. Happier and more alive. So i wonder what happened to my writings recently? Emosi berganda macam haram bukan? I need to rejuvenate la macam ni. I found my own blog is boring.. But then, dah my life is pretty boring and have no excitement. Maka what to do, am i right.

Anyway, after writing my previos post (yesterday) and doodled else where, i kindda found myself back. In a way, i feel like i finally actually letting go all the burden.. Well at least 10% of it.. Better something than nothing. Been thinking a lot too.. After i listed down everything, i think i am doing the right thing. I should learn to stop to care about people. If mereka survive, Alhamdulillah.. But if they fall, then its not my duty to help them.. Tried my best to guide but they failed to see that thou others can..

Overall, i am doing fine and ok.. Will try to embrace life to the fullest.. Promise, i will try :) As for now, i have to get ready for my friend's wedding reception..~

That is all blog.. Will update you later~


Lets End It Here~

Friday, January 14, 2011

Oh my LORD, only thee knows how exactly i am feeling inside. Only thee knows what my dreams, hopes and wishes are.. And only thee knows that i am not and shan't move from my dreams and wishes, not until i see with my own eyes that everything has fallen apart and will not be saved anymore. Until that happen, i am standing still here, praying for whatever things i have in mind to happen. People may call me stubborn but i prefer to be known as determination and faith.

Menjaga hati manusia lebih susah dari jaga duit dalam bank. The risk is higher and of course the end result (provided that things go well) is priceless. Sakit hati is something that i have endured and still enduring. Trust me, bukan public je betanye why am i still here.. I have questioned myself that very same thing over and over again. And i never have the clear answer except that i still want to be here eventhough at times i feel like killing myself.

Sangat percaya kepada pada janji DIA, setiap yang besabar akan dapat habuannya. Perhaps because of that i am still here. Also, DIA pernah bekata "AKU takkan menguji seseorang hamba melainkan ku tahu dia boleh terima/laluinya".. Hence, all i can say is, i believe in HIM and HIS words.. Enough said.. Though i know, i may interpreted it wrong.. Perhaps the reason why HE gave me all these were actually the cue for me to move on and see other options and embrace what HE has provided for me.. That could be also kan kan kan..

I dont know and im still all puzzle. Lots of people asked me to give up.. And trust me, i tried to give up.. Unfortunately, i cant. Sengal kan.. Bodoh kan.. Orang dah pijak kita mcm apa, kita still nak sabar and doa agar org tu berubah.. HE never intended to makbulkan doa aku or HE wants that person to "rojak2 n porak peranda" dulu then only realise what the person has missing..? Either one.. I dont know.. I really hope that things will go fine and be fine.. If not for the person, atleast for me. I had enough with all the heartache. Sakit hati, sakit otak and sakit mata.. Semua la sakit. I dont hate that particular person, i just hate how DOE treats his/her life and people around him/her.. He/she is one heartless person on earth.. GOSH.. And he/she said it is me who is being heartless.. Urghh!!

I dont wish to lengthen it anymore. I am trying to stop from talking and thinking about the events that have taken place as long as no one remind me about those. In able to do those, i just need not to be around people who can remind me of the person. Which it is kinda very hard as we both are in the same circle group of friends. Does that mean i have to find new friends? Hurmmm... Sialan! Then i will focus more on my study rather than worrying about whether the person is falling off or not from the "cliff".. Lantak dia la kan jatuh ke sungkur.. Lagi? Cukup la dulu kan.. Dua benda tu pun belum tentu aku mampu nak buat.. Nak jadi heartless, tak jadi jadi.. Nak jadi ganas, pun tak reti.. Nak jadi hati kering, tak bejaya2 dr dulu.. Lets try to find new friends first.. Wish me luck~

Later, ill blog about my new irani classmate.. Sakit otak aku.. ;p

Drama Frama~

Sunday, January 9, 2011

There will always be an endless drama. I am freaking tired but what else can i do. There is a quote and i forgot it was by whom, but the quote says,

"A clever man solves a problem and a wise man avoids a problem"

I hereby conclude myself i fall neither in the category. If i am a clever girl, i should have able to settle my endless and ongoing problem. And if i am wise girl, i should not have been in one since the beginning. There, i have said it. Hope that can clear things out a bit..

At this very moment, i am utterly feel so f*cking disappointed and frustrated with how things are. I am so upset and yet i have no one to share it with. Remember in my old post? About someone who keeps on blowing me off? I am under so much pressure and the only thing i need now would be a time out. Go out and do crazy stuffs just to distract me abit. But did any of my geographical friends understand that? Oh of course not!! I thank you people for that..

I am so thankful for having nena.. I texted her few nights ago.. Told her how depressed and unstable i am.. And her reply was awesome and really put a smile back on my face. Atleast i know i have friends who can be there for me.. Though i think she went overboard.. Nena bought a flight ticket back from UK.. Incredible kan kan kan.. Oh babe, i lebyu banyak3 la :)

Other new updates, Aqil turns two tomorrow but we did small birthday celebration for him yesterday. Close relatives and family ONLY.. Means NO dice. Had yamcha and gun fighting, balloons deco and design. No pictures, sadly.. I was busy mendling with my heartache. Demam dah baek cume now i am kindda lost appetite AGAIN.. U may call it eating disorder round two.. I cant eat cos if i eat, i would throw out.. So no food for me.. Yeay!!

That is all...

p/s: I am selling my bold 3.. Any buyers?? :p


::My first week::

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Apart from a week before exam, first week of class is important and crucial too. This is when you get to know who your lecturers are as in their real personality as during lectures time, they tend to be slightly different.. Also, during the first week you'd get to know what are their expectations and everything. Hard to describe in detail, but overall first week is really important to me. Even though i am sick, i still attended every single class though i had to bring anything and everything from home just to make my head, nose and feet comfortable.

Yup i am not well. Dah dua hari demam and i thank my friends for spreading the germs to me. They just sneezed due to the low temperature of the aircond but when sampai kat kite jadi lain pula. So tak pasal-pasal i had to use my 2011 sick quota early again. Asal masuk january je mesti kite sakit.. Why huh? Kejutan timbunan and expectation kerja maybe? And yes, i have assignments already.. Mencanak sudah.. Hehe~

Apart from class, my life is pretty fine actually. Cume ada a bit of annoying with someone. This person kept on blowing me off. Its really annoying, despite of whatever reasons. No offence but i seriously think your excuses and reasons are pretty lame. If others can actually survive, so why cant you? For the time being im just going to ignore your existence because that is the only way for me to not to get angry at you directly. I am not even going to tell you that i am disappointed in you because somehow deep down inside me i just feel like you would not understand and it is not my job to explain things to you.. So that is it.. Dont blame me for ignoring you, thank you~

Last but not least... I ended my week hours ago, at 11.30am to be exact. And my monday class has been canceled. So i will be having a long weekend.. 4days straight is heaven when you have flu and migraine... Pape pun, korang jeles tak?? ;p

Urm, enjoy the lyric down here ok :)

Dengarkanlah lagu dulu
Tinggalkanmu itu menunggu
Jangan biarkan hati
Dikunci oleh rasa benci

Resah yang tiada henti
Bila kau melangkah pergi
Apakah yang harus ku lakukan
‘Tuk merubah hatimu

Kurnia bagaikan khayalan
Takkan ku lepas walaupun apa yang mendatang
Kurnia bagaikan khayalan
Ku takkan lepas walau hanya khayalan

Senyumanmu igauanku
Tiada yang setandingmu
Suara yang bermain
Memanggil-manggil namaku

Resah yang tiada henti
Bila kau melangkah pergi
Apakah yang harus ku lakukan
Untuk merubah hatimu

Ulang Chorus

Pintaku cuma jangan pergi
Tak bisa berasingan jauh oh darimu

Bilakah oh nanti akan pergi
Berlari biarkan pergi
Buat selamanya biar kita berdua disinari
Oh mentari oh mentari

Ulang Chorus


Happy New Year~

Saturday, January 1, 2011

We ended year 2010 minutes ago and now we are already in 2011. Time fly so fast and i just wonder did i achieve anything in 2010 that i can be proud of? Urmm.. Mothing i guess, except for i started my study again in July.. Tahun yang tidak berapa membanggakan. But one thing that so thankful would be year 2010 was less heart breaking and i had less drama in compare to year 2008 and 2009... Alhamdulillah..

As usual, i did not go anywhere to celebrate. I was on my bed BBM-ing with until few minutes before midnite. Snap few pictures, but biasalah.. Mata lebih focus kat fireworks in real time rather than tengok thru the lense.. Haha Maka gambar memang super gampang :p

Some of the pics that i could consider "owh ada la rupe bunga api" ;p...

Last year, some of my resolutions were to read more books, to travel more, to have a less drama year and to kick some people out of my life. And i kind of achiever some of the resolutions. Hence, i really hope that i could achieve this year's resolutions as well. Here are some of my wishes and hopes for 2011, apart from being a good daughter to my parents, a great person to my friends and a good soul to dice..~

1- I would like to have a better yet simple life. Which means one time in 2010, i was in deep shit in terms of financial.. Towards the end of the year only i recovered and got the chance to buy most of the things i ever needed. Therefore, i really hope that my financial is better than last year and of course able to manage and plan my expenses.

2- Graduate on time. I am suppose to graduate my MBA in November 2011, therefore i really hope that my study will always on a smooth flow so that i would not have to stay longer than i should have.

3- I am trying to be a better person in the sense that i would not create any more problems and troubles. In order for me to do that, i must learn to say NO to people who request for troubles. (I tend to be kesian kat orang.. Layan kerenah orang then i got myself stuck).. Maka, i really hope that i would not have to face those kind of mess again.

4- I must finish reading all the books i bought.. Still have around 7 more books.

5- I must try to watch my diet and make sure that i will eat on time. Even if it is just a snack. Grab something to munch.. Also, i should delete chicken from my mind as i have to accept the fact that i am allergic to it.

And that is all... Happy new year everyone :)